Psychiatry Expert Onur Okan Demirci said that social media has damaged human relations. He added: “Couples always compare their relationship with people whom they see on social media and this has a negative impact on marriage.

According to the data from Turkey Statistics Institute (TSI), divorce rates have increased to 35 %. After a while, the couples started to compare their relations with other relationships shared on social media. Once this process begins, it can turn the whole relationship into a diseased one. We have been unable to devote time to our own relationships as we continue to examine other relationships. Small happiness has left its place to great desires.”

INSTEAD OF SOCIALIZATION, WE SEARCH FOR RELATIONSHIPS AT SOCIAL MEDIA

Expressing that rapidly developing technology has brought many problems together, Demirci continued: "We need to wait in front of our social media accounts to learn about the latest developments. Sometimes we postpone the works to keep our social media up-to-date or to follow others. We follow news, country and world agenda from social media. We even keep track of our closest friends and even the developments in our family on social media, and even collect the materials that can make us laugh - we need social media to laugh - we often seek social media relations rather than socializing outside. When this situation constantly repeats, it is called habit, as it makes us uneasy in the absence of dependency will not be a false expression.”

”SOCIAL MEDIA CONSUMES HAPPINESS”

Emphasizing that people become social media addicts day by day. Demirci said: “We can instantly learn what people at the other end of the world do. Different life forms and conditions are now under our hands. We can see what we have or do not have. Sometimes we envy, sometimes disgust, sometimes we get angry. Human nature is selfish. He wants everything for himself first. We are upset or jealous of why we are not the same or better, rather than love or feel happy for those who are better than us. Thanks to the social media, these sorrows and jealousies are now at hand. It is the shortest and easiest way to upset ourselves. The best way to break a pleasant moment is now in our hands. Instead of being happy in a place where we go to relax and make a pleasant holiday, we can suffer on social media by seeing our friends who go to better places. It will not be wrong to name social media as “the consumer of happiness”.

EVERYONE IS HAPPY ACCORDING TO SOCIAL MEDIA

Demirci said: “We do not really see people sharing bad moments in their social media accounts. When we look at social media, everyone is happy, everyone looks great. If this is true, we should be able to call the happiest people in the world are those who use social media. If we can see others' accounts and become unhappy, then this means what we share in our account are not real. If ours is not real, then happiness of others might also not be real. What we share in social media is what people want to see when they look in the mirror. I call it 'mirror reflection'. The reflection varies according to the characteristics of the mirror. We can look weaker, longer and happier than the mirror.”

THE COMPETITION IN SOCIAL MEDIA HARMS RELATIONSHIPS

Demirci continued: “Just like a person trying to quit alcohol or drugs, people are suffering from social media deprivation crises. We have become a refuge in social media to get away from the stressful business environment or in order to escape the tough moments in our relationship. It has almost become our only means of communication. We started to destroy “communication”, which is the main pillar in a relationship, through social media. In the near future, it is inevitable that divorce rates will increase in proportion to the increasing number of new social media platforms. Nowadays, the quality assessment of relationships has become comparable to the appearance of relations in other social media accounts. Compared competition brings competition ambition, greed becomes a virus that damages a relationship.”

AVOID COMPARISONS

Dr. Demirci continued: “People should definitely limit the time they spend on social media. I do not say that social media is bad, definitely not. I just say that we need to adjust the dose. Couples should allocate more time to each other than social media, and most importantly avoid comparisons that could become a virus. Everyone has happy and unhappy moments, social media is mostly a mirror equipped with an illusion of happy moments or unhappy moments, so keep this in mind. In cases when this problem cannot be overcome, it is absolutely necessary to have assistance from an expert. Otherwise, the same result will be inevitable in new relations that will start after the ending relations. Today, there are marital, family and couple therapists working in areas specific to such situations. Apart from this, training and seminars on these issues can be very useful.”